Went to Jac's place for a cookout lunch yesterday! We were supposed to meet at 1pm at her place to prepare lunch... so well... we had lunch... erm.. if u could still call it that.. at 4pm. No actually 4.30pm. And then they proceeded to prepare dinner...


Dinner was this broccoli broth... Gillian prepared it. It was made of tons of broccoli and onion and potatoes boiled to a pulp and then blended with a blender into this icky green cream soup. Everybody loved it.. except me. I never liked broccoli. I never liked cauliflower too for that matter.. To put it simply, I never liked any type of veggie that looks vaguely like a tree.


Anyway we had tons of fun at Jac's place! TF and her Prince William came as well.. and gawsh.. the guys actually prepared some of the food! Pictures later... when I get Huimin to send them to me.


Anyway, so we had the Ah Beng bible last time.

And then, people complain that I'm not fair.. cos they dont juz like ah bengs. They like metrosexuals as well!!

And then, I kept thinking... how the hell am I gonna come up with a metrosexual bible?!


OK but since I absolutely ADORE guys.. I think it's not gonna be that tall a task after all.


The KS's idiot's guide to identifying a metrosexual!

1. EARRINGS!!! No this is not the ah beng chunky and spiky type... it's the discreet sparkly type.... and it's not everywhere.. it's just in one ear! Remember ah.. this is different ok! Metrosexuals go for discreet display of taste and affluence. Not like the ah beng type of big big loud loud in-your-face type of dressing!


2. PERFUME! Metrosexuals ADORE perfume! I mean.. ok let's illustrate it this way. You see, I have these metrosexual neighbours. Actually, they are gays. But since almost all gays are metrosexuals, its the same.

But back to metrosexuals. You know... these metrosexual neighbours.. I absolutely HATE going into the lift with them. The minute they step into the lift, their odour fragrance will permeate even right thru my pores and into my pulmonary alveoli... OMG!! Finally I will walk out of the lift, staggering... faint from over-inhalation of toxic fumes.


3. MAKEUP! YES that is not exclusive to females... they have these male-targetted makeup as well! I was watching that show 男人帮.. or was it some xmas program?! Forgot! Anyway, they were teaching these male makeup skills. So how do males put on makeup?!

First, the indispensable foundation! Find a shade closest to your skin color and use it to blot out all unsightly scars and pimples! And then, to make your eyes look more alert, you could use...

MASCARA! YES! Not the black black colored ones of cos.. and most definitely not those pink and purple ones I have stocked up in my drawer. Use those colorless gel types! They are the saviours of all sleepy-eyed males in this world!!!

And how could u leave out lip gloss! The colorless gel type as well! OMG yes yes.. to make those lips look uber kissable and ultra yummy!


4. MANICURED NAILS! Yes yes... the latest trend ALL metrosexuals follow religiously.. at first it was juz simply manicured nails as in, nails with cuticles removed and shaped into a neat square shape. And then some guy called David went to a soccer match with orange colored nails. And then everybody followed suit! And now these punk rockers in Japan swear by their black as hell nail polishes.. and now metrosexuals all over the world are following suit! Now now.. aint that the easiest way to identify a metrosexual?!


5. BRANDS! Metrosexuals can't live without branded goods. From head to toe, they are all decked out in brands. However, it seems like one brand they all swear by is GUCCI! I dunno why.. Gucci shades, Gucci bags, Gucci leather shoes... everything! Next is LV. Yes they adore LV bags too! And Hugo Boss Parfums. Definitely. I mean, just look at that football player David.. the epitome of all metrosexuals. He's like, a walking luxury brand himself!


6. HAIR! Metrosexuals have perfectly trimmed and sculpted hair. Gelled and sprayed to perfection.. they walk out of their homes looking like they are ready for a model photo shoot everyday! Not one strand or bunch out of place! It all contributes to the perfectly-groomed metrosexual look!


7. HAIR! No this time.. it's not the same type of hair. U noe.. did u watch that show.. 40 year old Virgin? That part where they put that hot wax on his hairy chest, and then peel it off with great sadistic pleasure.... YES I bet all metrosexuals do that!!!! And I doubt they will feel as tortured when that wax strip is peeled off. I think they might even secretly enjoy it!

OWW!! OUCH!!! I LOVE IT! Come on baby... let's do it again! Peel that other strip off as well! Peel peel peel! OUCH OUCH OUCH! One more time!

Oh oh sorry... I got carried away again. Let's move on. Hahahaha


8. HAIR!! this time.. yet ANOTHER type of hair! EYEBROWS! Yes! ALL metrosexuals pluck their eyebrows! NO no no.. they dun make it pencil-thin.. like those ah mahs with embroidered-eyebrows. They make them just nice.. clean and tidy. But thin enough to look like they are plucked. YES that's metrosexual style for u.. the super-clean-cut and well-groomed type!


YEAH that's all! Aiya.. metrosexuals not very hard to identify la... and oh man.. its a growing breed in NTU! I can feel it in the air I can feel it in the atmosphere I can feel it in the canteen I can feel it in the library.. I can feel it everywhere! HMMM maybe... it would be the ultimate antidote to my ah-beng-addiction! YAY! I love metrosexuals! =D